today was a day filled with ups and downs. this morning while walking to school i saw this car and i thought to myself, wouldn't it be better if i get knocked down? won't i just like be happier? apparently i didn't do it of course. been having scary nightmares about war and friends every night, maybe its a sign from what kenneth and hannah says. really dunno... hannah thinks its the idols in my house which maybe true. felt really happy today after watching the video at chapel today, its like a therapy to me. i didn't know since when i felt so unhappy, stressed up, i even shouted at my mom, i can't believe like what i did, i feel so much calmer now like after i let everything out and cried about it, it just feels so much better. maybe i have been bottling it up inside and like this spiritual attack just hit me and everything flew out, all my fears and stuff. just feel really light now, like after the prayer thing today and talking about it to this person called shermin. i really felt him today while praying as though he was hugging me, his presence just really filled me.

went to math remedial and i ended up doing nothing, fooled around with the others and like started camwhoring with sihui. that was absolute fun but was super unproductive!

feel so thankful for like everybody all of a sudden, to all my friends, these are the people i am thankful for:(if i didn't include you doesn't mean i am not thankful for you being my friend)

hannah: thanks for like being so concern and like helping me so much, always listening to my problems. you are awesome girl and beautiful on the inside and out, feel so proud of you for achieving so much!

kenneth: thanks so much for listening to my problems today and like helping me out. you're awesome in your talks during pg, inspired me alot!

javier: thanks for like letting me rant on you about my problems. i know i treat you like really harshly sometimes. so sorry!

chuyi: thanks for giving such great advice, it actually made me forgive her. thanks for like being partners with me in chinese, and like helping me kill time in chinese lesson!

amanda: thanks for like going home with me and trusting me with your secrets. thanks for like hearing my problems and like keeping me company in dance.

mandy: thanks for being so funny and like always criticising the teacher with me, haha! thanks for also keeping me company in dance and being my stretching partner!

wanteng: thanks for like almost walking to school with me everyday when we meet on the train or something and like letting me see your artwork, its like awesome!